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The Redheaded Cheerleader, Photobooth Girl, John R, Beret Man, UD Santa. All of these people have come in and out of our lives over the years, leaving an indelible mark on our souls. Some have exited gracefully, fondly, and some have threatened litigation. Regardless, all have entered Blackburn Review lore, buried in the archives for future generations to discover. 

stewardessesesesNow we have The Stewardess, and I think we may have stumbled onto something very special. I am ready to SLUrrender my heart. Was this the first appearance of the Stewardess? I don’t know, and it seems rather immaterial. The important thing is that the crown, abdicated so unsympathetically by Photobooth Girl, has been claimed. The Sweater Centre has its’ queen, and she is good. 

As far as the actual game is concerned, as if that matters when you have discovered UD basketball’s next “it” girl, the Flyers dragged their feet to their eight straight win since the dismissals. Part of the blame can be attributed to the fashion in which Saint Louis conducts their business. Like Miami, the Billikens try to limit possessions and pace, relying on a strategy intended to lull the opposition to sleep. 

SLU’s style wore on Dayton in the first half, as the Flyers (who jumped out to a 9-0 lead) allowed the Bills to methodically creep back into the game — UD went into half with a 27-22 lead. Saint Louis put together some offense early in the second frame, trailing by one with seventeen minutes left in the contest. Nevertheless, by the time the two minute mark was reached, Gem City had outscored Saint Louis 25-8 and the Sweaters were already in the parking lot, emptying out their billowing catheters onto the frozen asphalt, steam rising from their human waste. As sluggish as the Flyers looked, they managed a sixteen point victory, 61-45, racking up their fifth A10 win, the squad’s eighth in a row.

SLU promised shitty offense and they delivered. Crews’ crew hit just 37% of their shots, 35% from three, and converted a mere 33% of their free-throws. In the past, Saint Louis had just enough offense to beat their opponents, their defense would rule the day. This season SLU is subpar on both ends of the floor, just a horrible, terrible, basketball team. An affront to everything good and holy. Rick Majerus would be rolling over the Fig Newtons in his grave (this might be my last Rick Majerus fat joke) if he saw today’s performance.

In sum, Dayton had one of their worst shooting performances of the season (22% from behind the arc) and still came away with a double-digit win, that’s living right. UD is incredibly 15-2 on the year, a perfect 5-0 in league play. I have run out of adjectives to describe the current run, and I can Google synonyms when necessary.  

I have reached that point where I can’t tell how good/bad this team/conference actually is. The competition over the previous five games has been mediocre to say the least. However, the Flyers have been hammering their A10 competition so far, winning by a margin of 17.6 points in their first five conference matchups. If you’ve been following UD over the years, you know how impressive that figure is. Someone named Nick Haldes saw court time for UD, it’s been that kind of season.  

Dayton will face a stiff challenge on Tuesday, traveling to face Davidson, a team that has surprised many this season. The Stewardess won’t be there, but we know where to find her, and that’s all the reassurance we need right now. 

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