I had a chance to go to Rupp Arena on Friday night to see how lesser programs do things. Rupp is attached to a hotel and a mall. In this mall is a food court with an Arby’s, a Subway, a bar, and a place to get chicken tenders. I think it might actually be named “Chicken Tenders”. The esteemed Matt Jones was doing a radio show from the food court, right next to a couple of cars and a model bathroom. Antoine Walker was signing autographs in one of the stores. Naturally, as a white person, I knew I was in a place made specifically for me.
The first thing I noticed about the arena was the lack of NIT banners hanging from the rafters. What kind of program are they? Kentucky’s 6’9″ jump shooting big man hit 7 threes, and their 6’8″ freak of an athlete actually had skill and made easy buckets. Is that even legal? That Calipari, always cheating. From the third row of the upper deck Nerlens Noel’s flat top looked amazing. Even more amazing was the make up of the Lafayette roster. Every single player was white. We thought maybe one kid wasn’t, but as an old hobo once told me…”When in doubt, it’s a white guy.”
Kentucky fans started streaming out of the arena with four minutes to go, which was vaguely familiar. Of course, they were up by 60 points at the time. All in all, Rupp is a good trip, even though they don’t give out free pizza and Lee’s chicken during TV timeouts. Five Kavanaugh Clown Pictures out of Five.
Another great experience? Barely cheerleader alumna here. Hi. How are things?.
Auburn basketball is a lot like Auburn football, worthless when they don’t pay for a star. Luckily for us, Chris Porter ran out of eligibility when Dyshawn Pierre was in whatever Canada calls Kindergarten. After a back and forth start, Dayton ended the first half on a 13-2 run (including 6 Devon Scott points and a Derenbecker made 3) and never looked back, cruising to a 73-63 win in the much hyped 5th place game of the Charleston Classic.
Kevin Dillard led the way with 20 points, 3 assists, and a lot of soiled red and blue pants thanks to him leaving the game with a knee injury. He did return and looked fine, so yay. DP3 followed up his magnum opus with a very solid effort, 7 points on 3/6 shooting and 6 rebounds. Devin Oliver continues to be everything he needs to be, dropping 12 points and 6 rebounds. Some guys for Auburn did well and some guys didn’t. You don’t care. You just want to see more of that Auburn chick’s boobs. Don’t we all…
For my money, the player of the game was Jalen Robinson. Coming off the bench seems to suit young Jalen, as he followed Friday’s good effort with 12 points and 7 boards. Right around the time that Dillard went down and it looked like maybe Auburn had life, he grabbed a pillow and ended it peacefully, scoring 10 straight Dayton points. He scored easy buckets, showed off a jump hook, and calmly knocked down a 17 foot jumper. He simply took the game over. When’s the last time a UD freshman did that?
All in all, you have to be satisfied with the Charleston trip. They dropped a tough game to a quality opponent, then dispatched two lesser teams with relative ease. And as far as I know, nobody got caught buying a hooker. Good work, Archie.
UD returns home on Saturday to play Manhattan. I would like to thank UD for scheduling a home game during the Ohio State/Michigan football game. It’s not like a good portion of your loyal and local fan base wants to watch that game or anything. No really, it’s cool. Thanks again.