Now...what can you expect from the blog this summer and next year? Yes, Tom and I are coming back in full force. We thought about shutting it down and going out on top, but we were scared that Ryan and Co. would hunt us down and kill us. Having full time jobs is nothing. You'd be surprised but writing for the blog isn't THAT hard. The hard part is getting motivated. With me living in Columbus and Tom living in New York City, it's difficult to follow the Flyers when all we have to rely on is the Dayton Daily News or the gestapo over at UDPride. I know I speak for Tom when I say that it is the readers that make this blog so special and fun to do. Some of the comments have made me laugh out loud, while some have made me want to punch someone in the face (BrownsFlyer and PJF). All kidding aside, it's nice knowing that even though BrownsFlyer dislikes me, that he/she keeps coming back and reading. So thank you. As for the summer, Tom and I are going to take a break. We are going to limit our posts to one a week which will be sort of like an email conversation between the two of us. These emails will talk about a range of things that might include Dayton basketball (how the Dayton Athletics will surely increase ticket prices this summer), non-Dayton basketball news (how Jack Black is really not that funny), and the completely absurd (how chair covers for a wedding reception cost $4.00 a piece). Of course, if anything huge breaks, like Luke Fabrizius transferring (at least, that's what the email from his dad to Tom said), we will be all over it like stink on a monkey. We also have at least two interviews with former players set up (hint: B.R. and R.M.) that will be posted here in the next few weeks. In terms of next season, we are going to come back stronger and better than ever. We have reached out to someone and starting next season (possibly this summer), Jim O'Brien will be writing for the blog. Whether or not that is a bad omen, I guess we will find out. So thanks again for everything and please check in this summer. First up this/next week: "A look forward for UD Basketball." And to show there are no hard feelings, here is a picture of Sophia Bush that will get you through this difficult time. Take it away Sarah!

Regardless of what you think about Sunday's performance, keep in mind that there were around 300 programs that would have loved to have traded places with "us"--before, during and even after our beat down in Minneapolis. I am hopeful that this season is the one we all look back on as the point where this program finally turned the corner. Although I thought the same thing in 2004, the pulse of the program feels stronger this time around. Obviously with the bulk of this year's team coming back, sans Chaz Little, next year figures to carry with it expectations of another NCAA tournament appearance.

I woke up Monday morning and already had an email with a copy of Jason Whitlock's article from the Kansas City Star in my inbox. The piece discusses Kansas' dismantling of our Flyers. Here is the passage that has ruffled more than a few feathers in the Ham n' Egg Army:

"Honestly, I played on and coached better-shooting intramural teams in college than the 2008-09 Dayton Flyers. Dayton, the runner-up in the Atlantic 10, might be on par with Colorado, the last-place team in the Big 12. Yes, in November Dayton beat Auburn and Marquette on back-to-back nights. November is college basketball’s exhibition season. The results shouldn't count.

I’ve never seen anything as pathetic as Dayton’s offense. On Saturday, I spent much of the afternoon wondering how Chris Wright, a big-time recruit, landed at Dayton. Sunday he provided an answer. He can’t finish at the rim, in the paint or on the perimeter. He’s Kansas State’s Dominique Sutton without the defensive intensity.

Wright is so raw that a vegan would put him in the microwave."

As far as the criticism of Wright goes, it's really nothing we didn't already know. Although Whitlock's words may come off as malicious, he is merely stating his opinion after seeing Kountry Chris' limitations first hand. Dayton fans know that Wright isn't capable of doing much outside of two feet from the rim. Kansas certainly knew this as well, as they practically dared Wright to shoot jumpers. Instead, KC continually drove into the lane, only to have Aldrich swat everything he threw up with the ease only a seven-foot mongloid could muster. Which makes Wright's recent comments regarding his future completely mind-boggling:

"I'm not worried about anything but our team getting better and getting my education in school," Wright said. "As far as the NBA — whether it's next year or my senior year, you never know — when the opportunity comes calling, we'll cross that road."

But wait, it gets better...

"Wright and his family haven't ruled out exploring the NBA this spring, though. Underclassmen can participate in pre-draft events and can retain their eligibility as long as they don't hire an agent. Wright said he'll rely on UD coach Brian Gregory for direction in that matter."

I would pay good money to hear Gregory's reaction. "Chris, say that you are fucking with me and I'll pretend this conversation never took place."

Back to the Kansas game:

• The AP was able to elicit Mickey Perry's thoughts about Cole Aldrich after the game: "He's just so big down there," Perry said. Well put, Mr. Perry. I am sure Aldrich, though confused, appreciates the endorsement. When asked to comment on Perry's statement, Sherron Collins was quoted as saying, "Who?"

• You have to look at this game from two perspectives. From an offensive point of view, Dayton was atrocious. That's a given. Defensively, the Flyers did everything they could to put them in a position to win. Collins and Aldrich were going to get theirs, and they did. Collins finished with 25 and Alrich scored 13. The rest of the Jayhawks were so terrible offensively (27% shooting) that you had to wonder whether or not Gregory recruited them as well. If you told me that Kansas would have been held to 60 points I wouldn't have believed you. If Dayton's offense was just mediocre, they probably win that game.
  

• Think about this for a second: Dayton was probably a length-of-the-court Rob Lowery lay-up against Fordham from being in the NIT. Instead, they were in the second round of the tournament, playing against one of college basketball's institutions. That's how capricious this season was.

• Lastly, Dan Foxxx and Luke Hendrick--but no Brad Mac? Gregory, you heartless bastard. McEldowney finished the season with 5 minutes and a personal foul. I don't want to alarm anyone, but I think we just enjoyed Brad's first and only season with the Flyers. Long may you run, Bradley Mac.

Kansas has overachieved all season. The Jayhawks graduated six seniors from last year’s Championship squad. All the starters left Lawrence with smug satisfaction and a “Get Out of Jail Free” card. With only four returning scholarship players, what were the expectations coming into this season?

My expectations, and most were similar, was a Top 4 finish in the Big 12 and a trip to the NCAA Tournament. Maybe even a W, if we got lucky. Needless to say, we've exceeded those expectations already. The real purpose of this year was to set the stage for a potential National Title run next year, and if Cole and Sherron stay, we've done plenty go work towards that goal.

Kansas is essentially a two-headed monster this year. A steady diet of Sherron Collins and Cole Aldrich has led this year’s Jayhawk team to a regular season Big 12 title. Dayton’s defense is so intense that it borders on criminal. The entire team was arrested after its game against St. Joe’s this year and charged with “defense of a smothering nature.” Charges were later dropped. I can guarantee you this much, UD will key on Collins and Aldrich and make someone else beat them—or die trying. Who is this “someone” KU can count on to score if Ebony & Ivory are held in check?

There are two prime candidates: Marcus Morris and Tyshawn Taylor. Both could explode, in their own way, and lead us to victory. However, the much more likely choice would be Tyshawn Taylor, a freshman guard. He is incredibly difficult to stop when he is going to the rim, and has a penchant for banking in the threes. Against Oklahoma, when we badly needed a third amigo, he came up big with 25 points, or something like that. He has the talent to explode, and if his jumper is on, he likely will.

Kansas is easily one of the most respected college basketball programs of all time. An endless round ball tradition, a roster that is continually filled with McDonald’s All-Americans, and a coaching pedigree that is unmatched. Dayton is…well, Dayton. Tell me everything you know about Dayton going into tomorrow’s game. (Besides the fact that Chris Wright is dunktastic.)

Basically, from what I've seen, you guys are like a mid-major version of West Virginia. Athletic as hell, rangy, long. Jay Bilas should call your games, because he'd have a field day. Also, tough-as-nails on defense. On offense, a team of mid-range jump shooters that struggle when stepping behind the three-point line.

Kirk Hinrich is without a doubt my favorite Jayhawk of all time. I think it was his hair and his Midwestern “aw-shucks-iness” that drew me to him. My roommate in law school interned for Hinrich’s agent and was charged with arranging some of Kirk’s “necessities.” His main objective was to get Hinrich free shit. Free cars, free plane tickets, free clothes, etc. However, this wasn’t enough. Kirk wanted to get free meals at his neighborhood Chili’s. So, my roommate spent countless weeks emailing and calling the restaurant’s marketing department in order to get Kirk free meals at any Chili’s across our great nation. The problem, of course, is that Chili’s is a franchise—so my roommate had to place calls to Chili’s whenever Kurt was on the road and wanted free Boneless Buffalo Wings and a Cajun Ribeye. Knowing this information, that a multi-millionaire wanted free food from a chain restaurant, do we like Kirk more or less? Dig deeper, what does this say about Mr. Hinrich?

Wow. That is awesome. I have no idea what to say, though. I mean, sure, it's free food, but at least it's just Chili's. It isn't like he wanted Ruth's Chris everywhere he went. And yes, I'm grasping at straws trying to find the positive. I've got absolutely nothing. To answer your actual question, though, I think that the 'likeness' stays the same. It goes up because it's "just Chili's", plus that's cool. It goes down because that's just selfish as hell. So, that's all I've got. No more love, no less love. Not to cop out, or anything.

One of the best socio-political books I’ve read, due to the fact that it’s the only one I read, is “What’s the Matter with Kansas?” by Thomas Frank. The premise of the book is that Kansans’ provide overwhelming support for Republican candidates even though conservative economic policies tend to hurt the working-class sectors of the country that are prevalent in the Midwest. Frank’s argument is that voters in Kansas are in a continual revolt against liberal social attitudes and forsake their fiscal well-being by supporting Republicans. Lawrence is supposed to be a hot-bed of college liberalism. I sometimes lay awake at night and wonder, do townies hate KU students? Do KU students despise the townies? Are the Socs and the Greasers going to battle in the quad?

I'm not a Kansas student, regrettably, so I have little to say about any potential brawls. And I can say you've got me beat on the amount of socio-political books read. But everything you said seems to make sense. Yes, Kansas as a whole is as republican as it gets (it even gets Mormon-filled Utah a run for its money), while Lawrence is quite liberal. They all get along, though, with Kansas basketball being the unifying force. Unless you're a K-State fan, then there's just Bill Snyder to unite the two. But Manhattan isn't nearly as liberal as Lawrence, so maybe there isn't a gap that needs to be bridged. I don't know.

Let’s get back to basketball. Bill Self stepped in after Roy Williams left for North Carolina and was able to bring home a title to Lawrence, something Williams was never able to do. How do KU fans view Self in comparison to Williams? Do they merely think he was like Steve Fisher or Tubby Smith in the sense that he could win with his predecessor’s players but could never achieve the same success with his own?

Most, including myself, like Bill Self more and, more importantly, consider him the better coach. Some still love Roy to death, and will never really move on, while others will hate Roy to death (literally, in their wishes), and will never really move on. But the majority thank him for his accomplishments while our Head Coach, wish him good luck in Chapel Hill and have moved on to Self. From watching both, like I said, Self is the better coach. As for the Steve Fisher/Tubby Smith remark, it couldn't be more different. Self struggled early on with first-round upsets to Bucknell and Bradley with Williams' players, before winning it all with a roster entirely devoid (besides Jeremy Case, who never saw the court save for blowouts) of Roy Williams' influences. If you're comparing Williams to Fisher and Smith, that is a much more valid comparison. And, one I would agree with. My theory is that he becomes too emotionally attached to his own players, when he recruits them and guides them through 4 years of college, and always finds a way to choke at the end. It's almost certainly unfair to put it on such a metaphysical thing, but that's my theory and I'm sticking to it.

A follow-up on Self, this is something that has bothered me for a long time and I figured that a Jayhawk fan could provide some clarity on the situation. What in the hell is on top of Self’s head? It clearly isn’t human hair. Is it a toupee, a wig, some sort of weave? Please put this mystery to rest.

If you look at old pictures, like mid-90's old when he was coaching Oral Roberts, it's clear what was up there wasn't natural. Not by a long shot. But now, with as much as I've seen him on the TV, I'm positive that it's all natural up there. Well, not entirely natural. It's almost certain he used hair plugs or one of those hair-growing things you see on infomercials that "grow your own hair". But it isn't a toupee, or a wig, or anything. Maybe that's just my love for him giving him the absolute benefit of the doubt, though. Who knows.

Wilt Chamberlain is the greatest player ever to wear a Jayhawk uniform. We’ve all heard about his 100 point game, about the season in which he led the NBA in assists, and the time he had his Dipper inside three women at once. A story about the Stilt that I’ve never head outside of UD circles discusses his recruitment by the University of Dayton. I will provide the following excerpt and I want you to react with extreme prejudice:

“He was promised room, board, tuition, a car, plane rides home to Philadelphia and $60 a week "pocket money" to go to the University of Dayton, but Chamberlain decided on Kansas, partly because Coach Forrest ("Phog") Allen was the only recruiter who suggested that he could get an education at college too.” (Time Magazine)

I have also heard reports stating that Wilt was going to come to Dayton before he realized that racist attitudes flourished in the Gem City. I have always doubted this story for two reasons: one, UD never had someone like Chamberlain in the program, so why would the most sought-after recruit in history come to Dayton? Two, Kansas wasn’t exactly the most racially accepting area of the country either. So, my question is—have these reports ever filtered through to Kansas fans or are they just tales of whimsy made up by a drunken Dayton sportswriter?

I'll be honest, I've never heard that Wilt the Stilt was heading to Dayton before. That quote was news to me. And, like you, I do find it hard to believe that he would have chosen Dayton over every other program in the country. But, who knows. Maybe he just wanted to take his act somewhere unique, to stand out. But no, I had never heard of him potentially going to Dayton.

You mentioned that you saw the UD/WVU game on Friday. What concerns you the most about this Flyer team?

Their tough, physical D and their athleticism. If we aren't hitting our threes, I'm very worried that we won't ever score, ever. Oh, and Chris Wright and our lack of a good matchup worries me plenty, as well.

Let’s hear a prediction. Give me the winner, margin of victory, and the player of the game.

I think we win. I keep on envisioning situations where we'll lose, and stuff, and won't be terribly surprised if we do lose. But, in the end, we're more likely to win than lose.

For the score, I'll go: Kansas 72 Dayton 61. Low-scoring, for the most part, but a couple of key second half runs by the Jayhawks aren't matched by the Flyers.

Player of the Game: Cole Aldrich. The dude is just too good to be contained. Even if they devote 2 or 3 players to the big guy, he should still score plenty. He's just the best.

You did it. You so and so's fucking did it. I didn't actually get to see it because I was cleaning up a bunch of "code twos" at the human petting zoo I work at. Yes, "technically" I could have watched the game against West Virginia, the game where you rose above 20 years of misery and broke through to the second round of the NCAA Tournament. In fact, I was actually watching television during the game. However, "The Sandlot" is only on so many times during the year, and while I am a fan of the Dayton Flyers, my heart really belongs to a ragtag bunch of little leaguers, a blind James Earl Jones and a pair of PF Flyers.

I have to warn you, I'm a greedy bastard. The win against West Virginia was unexpected, exciting and euphoric--like my last visit to the local VA hospital for a condition I have come to affectionately call "melancholy herpes and the infinite scratching." I want more. More bounce passes. More shots that are just like shots that count for two points, but are in fact awarded an additional point because they originated from a distance just a bit farther that the aforementioned "two point shot" (from what I can decipher, anywhere from 1.6 to 34 feet). I want to see London Warren's dreds in full Lil' Wayne crunkvision. I want London Warren to drive the team to the game in a diamond encrusted utility van only to be arrested for crunk driving five miles from the arena. I want London Warren and Brian Gregory to attend a camp where the instructors solely teach them two skills: how to make bird feeders out of coconuts, and how to beat Kansas. I want them to both room together. I want London Warren on top of their crunk bed.

I admit it--I don't just want this, I need this. I have never seen a sight so gorgeous (other than Brett Michaels' hair) than the victory against West Virginia. I need you guys to beat Kansas. I wish I could give you some pointers, but the truth of the matter is--I don't really know much about them. I think they are just like West Virginia, only a little less rednecky. I also think if you score more points than them at the end of the game, we have a decent shot at winning this thing. Let's keep that on the DL though, I wouldn't want let the media know about that last part before the game.

You have to admit it--it felt good to win the West Virginia game. Why not do it again? You know what happens if you lose? You go back to class. You have to remember, we still think of you are "student-athletes." In other words, lose to the Jayhawks, and on Monday you will be sitting in Statistics wondering what the hell happened and why you're not wearing any pants. Even worse, the depression that comes from a loss could be too much for me to handle. At this point, the excitement has reached such a crescendo that anything less that a victory could forever damage my psyche. Remember that game in Cincinnati a few weeks ago? I know we told each other that we would never bring it up--like that time we accidentally fell asleep on the couch together watching "Because I Said So" and woke up in each other's arms. You remember it; we ate a whole box of Oreos and accidentally killed that hitchhiker we picked up on the way back from Blockbuster. Anyway, spiritually that loss will seem like a picnic if you lose on Sunday.

There are not many times in life where you can have the opportunity to achieve greatness. Alexander was great. The depression was great. Jonathan Brandis' performance in "Ladybugs" was great (sure, when Gwyneth Paltrow and Hilary Swank dress up like dudes, they get Oscars; when Brandis asks us to reconsider our most basic of assumptions regarding gender roles his performance was less critically acclaimed than the clearly inferior performance of Jackee'). If you win on Sunday, you take one more step towards greatness. You're in the same no lose situation Ray Combs was in when he was given the Family Feud gig, the same no lose situation as Sammy Hagar when he joined Van Halen--so no pressure.

I should stop. I have said too much already. The truth is--there is no pressure on you guys and I don't want to add any. It has been a pleasure following you this year. Sure, there have been some ups and downs, but that's the way this floating blue marble works. I have praised some of you, cursed others, but through it all I think we all knew that we would be there for each other. I am proud of you guys. You never stopped fighting, even though I was the one who got drunk, threw a drink in that guy's face, and grabbed his girlfriend's ass while quickly getting the hell out of there. One piece of advice--we don't want Scotty Howard out there on Sunday, we want the goddamned Teen Wolf. I don't want to jinx you guys, but I have a good feeling about this game. A really good feeling. In fact, I felt so good, that come to think of it, I do have one last favor to ask. Just a small, little nothing. Please, please, cover the spread.

Yours in Christ,

James Oglethorpe

Brian Gregory just earned yet another bargaining chip. If I was AD Tim Wabler I would take BG to dinner tonight, get him plastered, take him back to my room for some champagne and tomfoolery, and just when things were going towards the point of no return--whip it out. All 11 inches. All 11 by 8.5 inches of embossed papyrus. Make him sign that fucker right on the spot. Let's break it down like the old days:

• Player of the Game? I'm sure that most people are going to remember Chris Wright's performance, and rightly so, but I would give the game ball to the lone senior on this squad (how good does that sound right about now?), Chaz Little. Little was HUGE down the stretch, scored six straight points when shit was getting iffy around the two and a half minute mark by hitting a few of his patented runners to keep the game out of reach. White girls of the Twin Cities...beware. However, please be advised--Chaz deserves to be serviced.

• Speaking of Kountry Chris, I got a text that said, "You said to watch Wright. I'm watching and all he can do is dunk." (I got KC marked down for 6 dunks against the Mounties) This would be the equivalent of saying all Picasso did was paint, that all Shakespeare did was write, and that all Corey Haim did was act. While certainly the preceding statements are true, it is still an affront to their both their accomplishments and legacy. I have been on record as saying Wright is little more than a freakish athlete in baggy shorts and a XXXL jockstrap, and I stand by that. But when other teams sleep on him, like I think WVU did today, he has the ability to make mere mortals look silly. Be honest, when Wright hit that three near the end of the first half you knew Dayton had more than a puncher's chance in this one, didn't you? You're fucking right you did. I'm not going to look it up, but I bet UD is undefeated in games in which Kountry Chris hit a long-ranger. Ruoff picking up his fourth foul with 18 minutes to go didn't hurt either.
  

• During the broadcast Gus Johnson recounted a story about Chris' mom. Apparently, she texts a spiritual message to BG and the coaching staff everyday at like 6 in the morning. Luckily, Gregory is usually just rolling home from a party that would make the shit going on in Eyes Wide Shut look down right pedestrian, so the text doesn't wake him from a pain-killer induced slumber like the rest of us. Still, if you were BG wouldn't you take Wright aside and politely advise him to tell his mom to cut that shit out? I guess when you have a player who spends half the game with his sack above eye level you don't ask questions. That's one thing I learned during my one long night in prison--when there are a pair of nuts at eye level, remain quiet and alert at all times. The other thing I learned? Prison guards respond to screams with laughter. Boisterous laughter.
  

• Haven't said much lately about London Warren's play recently, so here it is. The Jet has been fantasmic. Can't ask the kid for much more than his performance today. 9 assists in 25 minutes for the junior point guard. Didn't look that great defending Bryant, but the Truck is going to be one of those special ones--so it's excused. If London can continue this form the Flyers may have a few more gallons left in the tank.
  

• Couldn't help but notice that Luke Fabrizius played as much as I did. One, I commend Brian Gregory for realizing that the key to beating a team like WVU is with non-stop hands-in-pants defense, not through rolling the dice and hoping a 35% three-point shooter hits a bushel of threes to keep us in the game. If I'm Mr. Fabrizius, what's going through my mind right now? First, I'm probably wondering why I couldn't get a sniff of the court today. Is my defense that bad? (Yes.) Then, I'm thinking--what does this mean for my long-term future when I'm not even an option in Dayton's biggest games? (No clue, but it probably ain't good.) Lastly, does anyone on the bench realize how fucking high I am? I dressed out in our light blue throwbacks for christsakes.
  

• What are you going to say about UD's defense that hasn't been said already? West Virginia never looked comfortable against the young Afro-American men in red and blue. Ruoff was frustrated on both ends of the floor. Butler was never able to get a good look, instead he opted to throw prayers from 21 feet--going 0-6 in the process. Wellington Smith played like a hedge fund manager who did too many rails before a pickup game. Only future lottery pick Devin Ebanks showed the Minneapolis crowd why WVU was there in the first place. 36% from the floor, 25% from three. Those type of numbers are basically begging Dayton to eat your lunch.
  

• Although Marcus Johnson didn't have his best game today, his two early threes gave UD some breathing room and helped build some confidence early on. He was relaxed when the rest of the squad looked too amped early on.

• Wright - 34 minutes, Little - 31 minutes, Marcus Johnson - 36 minutes. Look for the Big Three to play as much, if not more, Sunday against KU. Gregory and his staff obviously took a big picture look at the team and decided to go 10 deep and maximize their talent. For those of us who were never quite on board with Gregory's substitution patterns, hopefully this is how we play the rest of the way.
  

I really like UD's chances against Kansas in the second round. The Flyers match up much better with the Jayhawks than they did against West Virginia. Outside of Sherron Collins and the Mongloid in the middle, KU offers little in the way of offensive firepower. I'm as pragmatic as you can get, so I offer the following with considerable pause: Dayton matches up even better against Michigan State. Don't look at me like I just shit in your hat, I'm just sayin'. The lesson we have learned this year is to never count this team out. Just when you think they are teetering on the brink of oblivion, they pull out a performance like this afternoon against WVU. Best part? Dayton has fuck all to lose at this point. Kansas awaits, Sunday 2:30 p.m.

• If you are one of those bed-wetting socialists who believe that the NCAA Tournament should be expanded to include every team, conference tournaments are for you. Think about it. Let's say you are UNC-Greensboro. Your record at the end of the regular season is 5-25. The Spartans have the same opportunity, in theory of course (I can't stress that enough), as Louisville to cut down the nets in Detroit. Follow me blindly on this one. Once UNCG enters the Southern Conference tournament, they are 10 games away from the National Title (granted a team like Louisville is only 6 games away). Win four games in the SoCon tourney, the Spartans are in the Field of 65. So, in a sense, every team in the traditionally one-bid conferences ARE in the tournament. They just have to play an entire regional to get to the big boy tournament. (UNCG is simply playing in the "SoCon regional," if that makes sense)
  

• The conference tournaments give teams one more chance to prove their worth. As Dayton fans, I think we can all agree that the win over Richmond solidified our place in the tournament field. Albeit precariously. The argument can be made, probably correctly, that Dayton would have been in the Dance if there wasn't a conference tournament at all. Furthermore, our loss to the Dukes, compounded with some conference tourney upsets, put us on the brink of expulsion. However, that's not the point. UD had a chance to improve its seed, possibly move up a line or two on the selection committee's board and place itself in a better position than they are in now. Bottom line, Elvis Aaron Presley (and Bachman Turner Overdrive to a much lesser degree) would have been bitterly disappointed, as the Flyers didn't take care of business. It's post-season basketball. Either put or shut up. In the end, Dayton probably did more harm than good in Atlantic City, but that's what March is all about. It's a weeding out process--you can't hide in the comfy confines of your home arena anymore.

• Finally, and most importantly, the conference tournaments give you something to follow, and possibly wager on, during working hours. I cannot stress how important this is. Last year, I found myself at a conference across from Madison Square Garden during the Big East Tournament. I could literally smell the stale piss and hobo excrement wafting into the hotel's ballroom from Penn Station. These were scents that ordinarily would have only titillated your average god-fearing Asian man. However, faced with the choice of listening to some blue-blood discussing legal ethics or walking across the street to watch Joe Alexander put his clammy balls in some poor, unsuspecting defender's face--MSG was screaming at me, calling my name. Ironically enough, I bought three session tickets from some West Virginia fans and enjoyed myself immensely. I sat with those three Mountaineer fans all day Thursday and Friday, in a sweaty suit, and drank enough beer to sexually-transmit fetal alcohol syndrome. If it wasn't for the Big East tournament, I would have spent two days sitting in a hotel conference room wondering how I was going to sneak a video camera into yet another women's bathroom.
  

I watched both tournaments this year with Dayton in the back of my mind. Figuring UD was more than likely headed for a #10/#11 seed, I focused on the mid-level teams from these conference tournaments. Using my god-given mental gifts, I deduced that the U of D could end up facing Clemson, Florida State, Boston College or West Virginia in the first round. Out of those four teams, I felt that WVU would give the Flyers the most trouble. So when the Mountaineers popped up on the screen, I held my breath and hoped that Dayton wouldn't be the name right below them. Sure enough, UD was the next team to be revealed and my night was officially ruined. Actually, listening to Hubert Davis' constant fake laugh ruined my night, but that is neither here nor there.

So with that said, let's take a quick, uneducated look at West, By God, Virginia...

Right up front, you have Bobby Huggins. I love Bob Huggins. I love his suits, his hair and his overwhelming surliness. People are constantly bemoaning the fact that Huggy's players don't graduate. That's a great argument if you can also tell me what Marcus Johnson is majoring in, and what that has to do with basketball, but really it has no place in measuring how good of a coach Huggins is. Some point to the fact that Huggins' recruiting tactics are less than admirable. As fans of a program that has been placed on probation, I really don't think we can afford to throw stones. So, you dig through the muck that people try to throw at Huggins and realize this: the guy is a great coach. Huggins took a Cincinnati program that was mired in the sea of mediocrity, longing for its glory days (sound familiar?), and put it back on the national stage by winning 75% of his games with the Bearcats. His stint at Kansas State, although short, was successful as Huggins was able to bring in recruits that would have never considered Manhattan, Kansas before his arrival. Returning back to his alma mater last year, Huggins led the Mountaineers to the Sweet 16--before losing an overtime classic to his former rivals in Cincinnati. This year, WVU was projected to finish ninth in the Big East and ended up getting an opening-round bye in the conference tourney before bowing out in overtime to Syracuse. Long story short, the guy can out-dress you before the game, out-coach you during the game, and out-drink you after the game.

A favorite Mountaineer player? Funny you should ask, as I actually do have one. It's Cam Thoroughman, sophomore forward from Portsmouth, Ohio. Although Thoroughman is merely a role-player for the Mounties, a stereotypical blue-collar rustic, he proved his mettle (to me at least) with his actions against Duke in the second round of last year's tournament. First, and foremost, there was a play at the end of the Duke game that brought me an unlimited amount of joy. Watch as Gerald Henderson, he of the infamous cheap shot on Tyler Hansborough, delivers a sneaky shiver to the back of Thoroughman late in the contest. Cam responds in the only way a brick shithouse from rural Ohio knows how:

Kudos, Cam. I must have watched that clip twenty times last season--it was the highlight of the tournament for me. Now most of us would have went back to the hotel, ordered up some cheese steaks, looked at a few back issues of Honcho, rubbed one out and took a nap. Not Cam. He wasn't done by a long shot. What he said after the Duke game leads me to believe that Mr. Thoroughman was somehow acting as a subconscious conduit, a proxy if you will, between myself and the media covering the game:

When told that the Mountaineers had just beaten a team with eight McDonald’s all-Americans, Alexander seemed startled. He arched his eyebrows and asked in a serious tone, “Who?” As a reporter was leaving, the reserve Cam Thoroughman asked if Duke point guard Greg Paulus was one of the eight McDonald’s all-Americans. When told yes, Thoroughman said: “Oh my God. Are you kidding?”

Cam, if I didn't think I would enjoy it so much I would kiss you right on the mouth. You accomplished more in that day than I will in my whole life. I wish I was being sarcastic...

Though he is my personal savior, Thoroughman isn't a starter and will probably not factor heavily in the proceedings on Friday unless there is ass to be kicked or cows to be milked. Da'Sean Butler, however, is the textbook definition of a starter. A mighty fine one at that. Butler leads the Mountaineers in scoring (17 ppg) and is second on the team in rebounding (6 rpg). You can guaran-fuckin'-tee that Butler will take 15-20 shots against the Flyers, regardless of whether he is feeling it or not. He is the Mountaineers' first option, a streaky outside shooter who can take it to the hole when the jumper isn't falling. From the handful of WVU games I saw this year, Butler was clearly the team's catalyst. If he struggles, the team struggles. Butler, a 6'7" forward will likely be matched up with Kountry Chris. I hope Chris takes notes, because it would be nice if he could develop into even half the player that Butler is.

The rest of the starting front court features Devin Ebanks and Wellington Smith. Ebanks, a huge recruit coming out of high-school, was headed to Indiana before Kelvin Sampson ran out of calling cards. Huggins, ever the opportunist, snatched Ebanks from the clutches of several other Big East schools when Sampson was summarily shitcanned by IU. Although he started slowly, Ebanks has really come on since the beginning of February, averaging a double-double in that period. At only 6'9", he is West Virginia's tallest player that gets major minutes (I would say that this gives UD an advantage in the middle, but....you already know that story). To put it succinctly, Ebanks is a rising star who will one day buy his mom a really nice house in a neighborhood full of white folks. Sure, the new house is big, in a nice, safe neighborhood and quiet--but where is she going to buy her hair products? The other starter up front is Wellington Smith. Smith, a 6'7" junior from Summit, NJ, is a role player known more for his defensive abilities than his offensive arsenal. There is no way that a tall black kid named Wellington in a white-flight suburb like Summit was an outcast, right?

The Mountaineer back court took a major hit when starting point-guard Joe Mazzulla was lost for the season after WVU's seventh game as he opted for surgery on a pre-existing shoulder injury. Mazzulla was the prototypical "pass first" point who was also the team's leader. Mazzulla ran into a little off-season trouble when he and a teammate were arrested at Pittsburgh's PNC Park for underage drankin' and scufflin' with cops. Who was the teammate arrested along with Mazzulla (like you really need to ask?). None other than living legend Cam Thoroughman. Please read, and educate yourself with the following:

Thoroughman said he did not have ID, according to the report. Police said he lied about his age and threatened a security guard. Police said officers brought Thoroughman to the ground when he refused to put his arms behind his back. While Thoroughman was struggling with the officer, Mazzulla tried to grab his teammate and punched a police sergeant.

Lessons to be gleaned from this incident? Go ahead and file these in your mental Rolodex under "6 More Rules to Survive Life":

1. Under no circumstance does Cam Thoroughman have to show identification. Although he technically resides in Morgantown, West Virginia, Thoroughman is the only person in America recognized as his own country by the federal government. Demanding identification is essentially a declaration of war.
   
2. If you anticipate asking Thoroughman a direct question, realize that you will be threatened.
   
3. If you do plan on tangling with Cam, be prepared to be taken to the ground. Quickly and without warning. Like a bear in the wild, Thoroughman will instinctively bring his prey to the ground, incapacitate it and have his way with the corpse.
   
4. Do not offend Cam by making direct eye contact. The only exception to this rule is if you are a stripper in an "anything goes" strip club (the kind your father goes to when he is on a business trip. Don't worry, he still loves your Mom.)
   
5. Any instruction given to Thoroughman will immediately be refused and ignored. This includes orders to stay out of plane cockpits, demands not to defecate wherever he pleases and the word "No."
   
6. If you happen to walk in on Thoroughman making hard, vicious love to your wife/girlfriend (which you are bound to at some point)--quickly hide and take notes, you might learn something. Refer to rules 1-5 for your safety.
   

West Virginia is not a deep team. Besides the aforementioned Thoroughman, only fellow forwards Kevin Jones and John Flowers play substantial minutes off the bench. Which isn't to say that the WVU trio does not provide any production. In addition to having three bangers to throw at unsuspecting opponents, Thoroughman, Jones and Flowers combine to get the Mountaineers around 13 points and and 11 boards a game. They are the equivalent of one Ryan Perryman. I hope it felt as good to see that name as it was to type it.

Let's take a passing glance at how the numbers stack up:

	PPG	FG%	FT%	3P%	RPG	ORPG	DRPG	APG	TPG	SPG	BPG	FPG
Dayton	67.5	42.8	64.5	33.1	41.0	13.8	24.2	14.1	13.8	6.3	3.5	19.0
West Virginia	72.4	43.0	69.6	33.1	42.0	15.2	23.1	15.3	12.0	6.8	4.6	18.8
UD Opponents	61.5	39.6	70.1	31.7	35.8	10.2	22.5	11.8	14.8	5.0	3.6	18.3
WVU Opponents	61.6	41.9	68.5	30.0	36.1	10.6	21.9	11.3	15.6	6.2	3.5	18.8

These teams are damn near mirror images of themselves. Granted, West Virginia played in the nation's toughest conference, whereas Dayton was able to get fat on a much weaker schedule, but...still. West Virginia is battle tested. In addition to a rigorous Big East slate, WVU played Iowa, Kentucky, Ohio State, Davidson, Miami, Duquesne and Cleveland State in its out-of-conference schedule. Like most Huggins teams, the Mountaineers are a stingy bunch. As a sporadically effective offensive squad, West Virginia relies on its defense to win games. However, with only a few minor exceptions, the Moutaineers lose if they don't score over 70 points. Dayton has not faced a defense this physical all season, and it will be vital for the Flyers to respond in kind. The key to this game will be whether Dayton's defense can keep the game close enough for the Flyers to have a shot at the end. If Ruoff and Butler are scoring in bunches, it will be a long afternoon in the Metrodome for the young black men in red and blue.

Prediction: Doesn't matter, I'm always wrong. Vegas has "us" as a 9 point underdog against the Mountaineers. That feels about right. My thinking on this game is that there are two, and only two, possible outcomes. One, UD gets blown off the court from the jump and WVU never looks back. Huggins begins to openly drink Crown Royal from a dixiecup midway through the second half, and Hendrick, Foxxx and Brad Mac are on the court when the clock hits triple zeros. The second outcome would involve an absolute mockery of modern basketball. Both defenses place the opposition's offense in a chokehold until the last five minutes of the game. UD makes one less mistake than West Virginia down the stretch and escapes the Dome with the upset. Gregg Doyel rejoices as he is respected for the first time in his life. Either way, this game is supposed to be a reward for a successful season--so enjoy it, as they are few and far between in the Gem City.

ONE HITTERS...

Am I a bad fan or just a bad man? I've been thinking about this, and perhaps I am not as die-hard as I thought. You could offer me a first-class plane ticket to Minneapolis, a suite at a four-star hotel, front row tickets to Friday's game against West Virginia, and I would still turn you down. For as long as I can remember, I have watched literally every second of NCAA Tournament coverage. I have bought TV packages, paid covers at sports bars and even purchased the March Madness on Demand app for the iPhone this week like an idiot. I have an unhealthy fixation on this tournament and being in one place, with the ability to only watch four games unfolding in my presence, would bring on an obscene amount of anxiety. If I was in Minneapolis, I would feel like I was missing out on things. I would constantly be checking my phone, wandering out to the Metrodome's concourse to catch coverage on television and calling people for updates. Plus, if Dayton loses on Friday afternoon, that's a long flight back. First-class or coach.

Whipping Boy 2.0 Is it just me, or is ESPN's attempt to turn Digger Phelps into college basketball's version of Lee Corso failing horribly? Each bit and commercial Phelps is involved with seems forced and contrived.

Food for Thought, Whatever That Means. Resist the temptation to put UD in the Elite Eight. There are 11 teams in the NCAA Tournament that averaged less than 68 points. There are 13 teams in the field of 65 who have a losing road record. There is only one team that averaged less than 68 points a game AND had a losing road record. Take a guess...

Brian Gregory, You Disgust Me. Add Brian Gregory to the list of limp-wristed pussies that want to expand the tournament to 128 teams. Here is the thing, it makes perfect sense for a coach to be in favor of expanding the field. For the most part, making the tournament is the main measuring stick of coaching success. The easier it is to make the tournament, the easier it will be to be considered a success and sign ridiculous contracts (It would also make it easier for schools to get their sticky fingers on that tourney cash). We have already seen how watered down expansion has made the college football bowl season, why would we want to do that to the best event in sports? Do you really think that after this weekend we are going to be sitting around saying how much better the tournament would have been with St. Mary's and Penn State in the field? Let's just give all 320+ division one college basketball teams ribbons that say "Participant" on them and be done with it. Let's not get confused, the NABC is essentially a union. Coaches are looking out for what's best for coaches, not what's best for the game. Lastly, I wonder how Gregory felt about this before his team won 26 games and was almost left out of the tournament.