Suck it Bill Simmons. This is happening.
20:00 – Even Bob Valvano thinks his brother was a cheat and a fraud.
19:36 – First turnover for Dayton. Starting out well
18:20 – Dillard with a nice assist to Oliver. Valvano just said Dillard doesn’t score much but gets a lot of assists. OK.
16:57 – Another turnover for Dayton which leads to Oliver crushing a Temple player, which of course leads to Dayton fans booing. Wow…OK, that wasn’t a foul?
16:19 – Hollis Jefferson with a pretty and 1. Devon Scott with 2 fouls already. Benson is happy that he gets another chance to suck.
15:25 – Timeout Dayton after a Temple dunk from a Benson mental lapse. 9-2 bad guys. Dayton is turning it over and Temple is making them pay.
15:08 – First media timeout. Why are the UD cheerleaders wearing shirts over their uniform??? Stock footage shown from outside UD Arena. I think that is the bank on the Little Miami where that one dude murdered himself after jumping out of a police car which also almost started a race riot in Dayton. Fun times.
14:08 – Sanford showing nice touch with the mid-range jumper. 9-6 now. Apparently the Flyers were made to clean the arena after Wednesday’s game. Dead Joe Paterno approves.
12:06 – Wyatt is angry at the officials. If I could read his mind, it is probably thinking, “You were in on the prostitution sting I was busted in, right? I hate white people.” Still 9-6 at the second media timeout. At the media timeout, Sean Finn accepts a surfboard from the 2013 Maui Invitational. Looks like an awesome field and I would love to see Dayton play Gonzaga. And it looks like the cheerleaders are wearing shirts to promote the Maui Invite. Still lame.
11:15 – Hollis Jefferson has 7 of Temple’s 11 points. And they have been easy buckets. Bad bad interior defense today.
10:23 – Devin Oliver with a sexy and 1 to tie it at 11 a piece. Devin wins the “Frustration MVP” award this year. One game he is a double-double machine, the next he can’t even get on the scoreboard.
9:30 – Benson with a lay up from a nice pass from Dillard to take the lead, but then commits a stupid foul on Wyatt (who leads the A10 in scoring) on the other end. 13-12 good guys.
9:13 – Dillard drains a 3 to put them up 16-12. I am already getting tired. This running diary thing sucks so much ass. I’m blaming Nemo. Score by Temple on the other end, followed by a dunk by Benson. The teams are picking up the pace and I’m picking up more Dr. Pepper to stay awake. Who schedules an 11:00am game?
6:39 – Third media timeout has Dayton leading 18-16 with Benson on the line. A quick look at what’s on TV for me to watch at halftime. Charlie’s Angels is in the lead for Blackburn, as it has Lucy Liu in it. The 40-Year-Old Virgin is the last time Steve Carell was funny. The Pregnancy Pact on Lifetime probably will have some hot 80s chick like Elisabeth Shue in it. What’s this? Open Graves staring Eliza Dushku? I’m in. SyFy has never done anything wrong.
5:00 – Temple is turning it on because of second chance points. A 10 point run puts them up 26-19. Gross.
3:28 – Two free throws from Kid Canada stops the bleeding but Temple comes back with an answer. 28-21 Owls at the last media timeout. Classic Temple basketball clinic today as the team only has 1 turnover.
2:00 – Jalen Robinson gets a nice offense rebound after Dayton choked from the line. Wyatt bricks a 3 ball but of course Temple gets the offensive put-back. Wyatt hasn’t scored a field goal all day, yet Dayton is still down 30-26.
38 seconds – Kid Canada with some sexy back and forth moves (think the Hakeem shake) to put Dayton down by 2. The student section then breaks out the “Go Dayton Flyers” cheer. ATTENTION RED SCARE!!! It is Dayton, not Daytoooon. STOP. IT. There is a reason you and the band is made fun of constantly. You suck.
5 seconds – Dillard (of course) tries to drive it to the lane and gets fouled. His two freebies make it 33-33. Tie game at half? FALSE. Wyatt drains a 3 in Oliver’s eye to take the lead.
19:20 – We’re back. I lied about SyFy. God that was fucking horrible. And Dushku kept her clothes on. Major let down. Anyway, Temple comes out quick with a basket to go up 5.
17:15 – Dillard, Wyatt, Dillard, Cummings, Oliver (for 3). And I think Dillard took out Mike “Check That” Hartsock. This is hard to keep up. 42-40 Owls.
16:25 – Sanford passes up the 3 and drives in for an and 1. SO glad he will still be here next year.
15:53 – Tied up at 43-43 at the first media timeout. So far so good Flyer fans. No looking good for the UD band. Has there ever been a bigger section of dorks at a school?
14:13 – Wyatt is breaking ankles out there. Another 3 to put the Owls up 46-45. Fucking alligator blood!
12:56 – Jalen Robinson with a great and 1. Guy is showing what Benson never does and that is that he is not a pussy. He went up strong for that one. 48-46 good guys. But Wyatt comes down and ties it.
11:22 – Two freebies by Dayton, followed by good defense by Scott to force the jump ball, and then Sanford comes down and drains a mid-ranger. 52-48 at the second media timeout. The announcers say “It’s the Sean Miller hit parade.” Not Dayton’s coach, but just go with it.
10:51 – Dillard with the and 1 to give Dayton their biggest lead of the game at 55-48. Dayton needs to put their feet on the throat…and Wyatt quiets the crowd with a sick bucket and a chance for an and 1. He misses the free throw but man, this guy is insane today.
9:01 – Benson blocked again. HOW??? So glad his days are numbered at Dayton. But then he makes me eat my words and puts Dayton up 57-50. He must have heard me. Hey Benson, stop it with the white poison!
7:48 – Flyers are up 58-52 at the third media timeout. This game is getting a lot sloppy. Fran Dunphy looks like he might die on the bench at any time. Dayton is shooting 60% from the field while Temple is shooting 35%. That helps.
7:30 – Wyatt says “Fuck this shit” and goes to the lane for an and 1 opportunity. But then misses the free throw AGAIN. Point shaving??? I’m not saying, I’m just saying. What was the line on this game?
6:15 – Dayton milking the clock and jacking up desperation shots. Not good. But Benson gets away with a walk with another and 1 opportunity.
5:34 – Temple is jacking up the 3 ball like nobody’s business and they ain’t going in. But Sanford just nailed a 3 AND gets fouled. Fucking HUGE. Free throw is no good, 66-56 UD. Let’s keep this up Flyers!
3:48. Dayton leading 68-59 at the last media time out. It’s go time. Get your 5 hour energy drinks ready Flyer fans.
3:14 – Temple finally hits a long one. 68-62. Dillard milking the clock (again), throws up a shitty shot, pulls down the Temple defender, and gets the call. Dayton finally getting some luck?
2:31 – Temple nails another bomb. Shit. 69-65 “Flyboys.” A preview of the Miami/Akron game. As someone who knows Oxford very well and with how nice it is outside, I am guessing there will be about 10 students there.
1:43 – Randall with an impossible shot to put Temple down by 2. Jesus Christ.
1:08 – Oliver with a LUCKY roll to stop the bleeding. Dayton is still trying to piss this game away. Good Lord that was so lucky.
49 seconds – Benson gets burned, again, which leads to an easy Temple dunk. 71-69 Flyers. Just had a classic Gus Johnson moment. Down by 2 with 48 seconds, do you foul? Yeah, no. Just let Dayton “Dayton” themselves and get the ball back. Dillard gets trapped and smartly calls a timeout.
20 seconds – Dillard gets trapped and travels. “That team just Dayton’ed themselves” really should be a thing. Don’t let Adam fool you, that was no foul on Dillard.
7 seconds – Wyatt (who else???) just straight crushes my life and nails the bomb to put Temple up 72-71.
3 seconds – Dillard dribbles it off his foot. Classic Dayton.
2 seconds – Temple misses 2 free throws…not over yet!
1 second – Did the referees just call an off the ball foul??? Holy shit! Give Josh Benson a fucking Academy Award! Josh Benson to the line. Make me eat my words Josh! $%#@^%$!!! He misses BOTH! 6 straight missed foul shots (4 by Temple, 2 by Dayton). 72-71. Owls win. Jesus fucking Christ, is this season over yet?